Shopping for Clothes in All the Wrong Places
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As a transgendered cross dresser, I have made an amazing discovery: it seems that almost any article of women's clothing or shoes will fit perfectly well on the internet. The problem comes when it doesn't always fit when I unpack it and try it on. Kinda funny how that works.
I can only guess at how much money I have wasted because I sought the safety of the internet for shopping. If you are like most of us, I bet you have also. Like many guys, I have too-long arms and I have a tendency to over compensate. I always wanted a black skirt-suit and finally saw just what I wanted on-line and waited a year for the price to come down which it did. Just to be sure that the arms on the jacket were long enough I ordered what I thought would be two sizes too large. When it got here and I eagerly unwrapped it I found that the sleeves were actually a bit longer than necessary and that the entire outfit looked awful on me. It was huge and I never wore it. I was devastated. I felt so bad that I kept it in my closet for a year before I finally left it at Goodwell's doorstep. It was a hard lesson to accept since it was not the first time something like that had happened. So here are some thoughts which might be helpful if you just happen to be a guy shopping for women's clothing and really can't get yourself to tell the clerk that your wife is the same size as you. (She probably will doubt you anyway.)
I am assuming that you go shopping dressed like your usual guy self who is trying not to attract any attention.
Shoes. Always wear black opaque trouser socks and slip off male shoes when you do this. I hope you have discovered Payless because you might find an excellent selection of your size (up to ladies 12). I say might find because their stores vary wildly in the selection of larger sizes. Anyway, pick up a pair of heels that appeal and walk over to the men's section. Put the box down and simply slip them on. If you stay put and don't go walking around then chances are that no one will notice you. Really! After I did this for a while I reached a point where I could get myself to try them on for a moment right at the ladies rack. I mean, you will not see any of those people again anyway. I also have been passed by clerks on two or three occasions and they would smile and offer to be helpful. I must admit that it made me feel very good and I am still working out the lesson that has taught me.
Pants. This is easy. I usually do a lot of shopping in places like Target and I pick up a couple of pair of guy pants to carry around. I just place a pair or two of ladies pants in between the guy pants on my arm and walk into a men's fitting room to try them on. This works best when the person in charge of the rooms seems to be either very bored or nearly blind. But seriously, it works well and avoids a lot of mistakes caused by guessing.
Underwear. Do this one just like the pants only use guy shirts instead so that they sort of wrap around the lady things. It's easy and it's non-stressful.
Wigs. I can't think of any way to do this other than to go into a wig salon dressed and let it happen. You can check on-line first to see which stores are TG/friendly but you will find that most of them are. Our money spends just like anyone else's and we spend a lot of it. If you are concerned about passing - who isn't - then call the store first or drop by in boy stuff and ask the owner if you can be seen after hours or in a private room. The answer is usually "yes."
Cosmetics. Well, I have a wonderful wife who actually goes with me and acts as my expert. It has saved me tons of money. If you lack such an angel, then check out the cosmetic departments of good department stores. There might be a room where you could receive some private treatment and advice. You will pay more for the cosmetics, of course, but you will be well rewarded by wearing the "right stuff". BTW, if you are in a strange town and want to shop with no thought to being remembered, go on-line and look up places such as PaylessShoes or Dillard's or Target and use their store locater link. If you combine that with Mapquest you will do just fine.
Shopping great fun even if it is one of the forbidden fruits. In fact, that probably contributes to making it fun. Enjoy yourself. And, if you do get "busted", you might find that the average person is a great deal more understanding and helpful than you ever imagined.
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I can not beleave that some else does the same thing I do. I also for year now been going to payless ,famous foot wear and try on all my shoes. I only buy women shoes, not "those" shoes made for men. I only wear femal under garments. I buy from "v-secrets" they know me at my store. As for make-up it's been on a hit and miss but it's been fun. I read s lot about make-up and technics... even teaching my wife. Well girls of fun life is to short not show off your pretty sexy selfs. Ronie
I think "get experienced" is the best advice.
The more you shop for feminine attire the easier the whole experience gets.
My best experiences are always when I am treated just like any other female customer. Of course to be treated this way you must tell them "its for you" Try it..its easier then you may think!
never have a problem trying on skirts ect at walmart they dont care weather you are a guy or girl when you go to try them on.
it is better to tell them they are for you than try to lie to them and say they are for the wife, sister, girlfriend just tell the truth no one is bothered they will most likly help you in chosing somthing that will fit correct than anything else after all they are there to help you.
I love some of the shoe styles at Dillards and Penneys but they carry nothing over size 11. I usually wear a women's 12 and Payless is one of the few places that have them on hand. I don't know if it is at all of their stores, but the women's largest sizes are on the same aisle as the men's shoes. Wow, what a convenience. I have tried on many a pair of heels, sandals, etc and never thought twice about it. Bought quite a few, also. Like you said, when a clerk has walked by, they were nothing but helpful and respectful.
You sure are right in saying to try things on to make sure they fit. Good advice, especially since manufacturers can't seem to agree on what sizes mean. One company's Large can match another's Extra Large.
Try going to the men's fitting room without the men's clothes camouflage. The staff won't care... they hope the store will make a sale. Customers probably won't even notice. And even if someone raises an eyebrow, it just adds a tiny bit of awareness to some person that there are people like us in the world. This awareness is definitely growing, and that's a good thing!
I'm with SatinJenni on this.
I've found when shopping in most stores it works best to be straight about it. I've taken skirts right in men's fitting rooms at department stores, and at Ross and similar stores. I just tell the clerks I like to wear skirts sometimes, and usually add that it would be nice if they sold them in the men's section. the stores with adjacent or unisex rooms are easiest of all. You would be surprised how many of the clerks end up chatting with you, and also agreeing about choice in clothing. A number of female clerks have told me they wished their husband wasn't too uptight to wear the odd woman's piece. One carried on a conversation with me over the wall, whilst I was trying on various women's yoga pants, she loved the fabrics (supplex and other slinky nylon ones), and hoped I did too!
Most hosiery and lingerie clerks are really helpful, I just tell them I like the fabrics and cuts, which is totally true. The hosiery clerks are almost always interested, and helpful. more than a few have had long conversations with me about hosiery - they go and grab new packages, and open them to show me the products, and several have hiked up pantlegs, or raised a leg when skirted to show me how the product looked. Nordstrom's in particular is excellent, they obviously train the clerks to be helpful to anyone. Their hosiery clerks are generally quite knowledgeable. I think every one of them I have dealt with seemed genuinely okay with men wearing women's hosiery, and several were highly enthusiastic.
I don't wear women's tops, or heels, or try to look like a woman. I like skirts, and hose, and panties, and some casual shoes, middle height chunky heels at most. I like the way skirts and hose feel and look, and women's shoes don't look massive like most men's seem to need to.
The funniest time I had with a clerk or fitting room guardian was a big jock looking kid at Ross, I had a very nice pleated black skirt, a supplex sports skirt, and several men's casual shirts. He was speechless when I happily told him I hoped the pleated skirt fit, and when I came out, and told him it was success, he said he wished he had "as good balls" as I did.
My boyfriend would not feel comfortable shopping for himself. so I always go along. He wears panties whenever we go out, and sometimes a bra. We vacationed in the Dominican Republic and he wore panties daily and sometimes a bra too. I encourage him by buying him girly gifts sometimes. None of it shows under his guy clothes.
I go shopping for my own Panties, dress, and skirts with no problums. Some times my wife goes with me. But most of the time I go by myself. Men and women should wear what they want. So many stores to pick from and never had any hassels.
tonyahotty 4 years ago
Like they say Just do it!! I always like to to listen that Gwen Stefani song What are you waiting for, It get's me to get my nerve up and either go out or to go shopping in a new store or during a busy time. Take a chance and you might grow Ohhh oh ohhhh your still a super hot FEMALE!!